SQUATCHFOOTMEDIA
The Proving Ground · Patient Zero

CrimeWave · True-crime themed cruise · Multi-day · At sea

The cruise we built the whole suite to run.

CrimeWave is our own event — a multi-day true-crime cruise packed with superfans, panels, and meet-and-greets, sailing days from the nearest cell tower. It's also patient zero: the reason Squatchfoot Media exists.

Full disclosure: we're our own first customer. This is the event we built the suite to survive — not a logo we borrowed.
3,000+ superfans aboard
$1.4M cashless, offline at sea
60+ panels, shows & meet-and-greets
0 bars of signal, zero problems
What it demanded

A cruise is a festival that floats — with no signal.

Everything CrimeWave needed is everything the hardest events need. So we built for it.

  • Cabins, tiers, and add-on experiences booked a year out, on payment plans that hold
  • Panels, live shows, and meet-and-greets across a dozen decks — in every guest's pocket, offline
  • Cashless from the first drink to the last, days from the nearest bank
  • Excursions, muster drills, and set clashes on one run-of-show the whole crew shares
  • A true-crime community that stays hooked between sailings
How it started

We were the frustrated customer.

We didn't set out to build software. We set out to produce CrimeWave — and got buried under five tools that didn't talk to each other, a box office that didn't understand cabins, and a bar that wanted cash in the middle of the ocean.

So we built our own. First the box office, then the attendee app, then every piece the boat needed to run without a signal. CrimeWave sailed on it, bow to stern.

It worked so well that the producers we showed it to wanted in. That's when Squatchfoot Media stopped being one cruise's internal tooling and became a platform. CrimeWave is still where every feature gets tested first — if it can't survive a true-crime cruise with no signal, it doesn't ship.

“We're not a software company that dabbles in events. We're producers who got tired of bad software and built our own — and CrimeWave proves it every sailing.”

Placeholder Name · Founder & Executive Producer, Squatchfoot Media
Every tool, in the water

CrimeWave runs the whole suite.

Not a curated demo — the actual eight tools, on our actual event, every sailing.

If it survives CrimeWave, it'll survive your event.

Bring a real one — we'll set it up live and you can decide from there.

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